Mommy's Nintendo Is an Indoor Pet

I don't like to play outside. I might like to sit outside. In the shade. When there's a cool breeze. If there's a good reason. Or at the beach (in the shade, still). But mostly I like to be inside. Where the air conditioning is.

The problems with this are:
1. I have 2 young daughters who are not indoor animals.
2. I live in the South, where it was already nearly 100º at the end of May this year.
3. It hasn't been raining enough for me to claim that as a valid excuse for denying my children outdoor time.

On the plus side:
1. We have a GIANT oak tree in our front yard. Ours is 1 of only 2 houses in our nearly clearcut neighborhood with an original tree in our front yard so we've got some shade there.
2. Lulu's school, which is only a 3 minute drive (plus 28 minutes for getting out of the house and into the car, but who's counting that!) and now closed for the summer, has a nice playground that is also shaded by a GIANT oak tree. And the girls like it there. And we're allowed to use it.
3. Aside from May, June, July, August, and September, the weather here is actually pretty nice, and I might be tempted to go outside. Maybe... Sometimes...

So what I'm saying is this: If you want to play outside anytime between a month ago and 3+ months from now, don't worry about inviting me. But would you take my kids?